Bearable Embarrassments

Everyone has embarrassing moments. Some people just have more frequent embarrassing moments than others. I am one of those people. People also choose to cope and handle their embarrassments differently when the moment comes. But we didn't always use to be like this. As kids, we were naive, innocent, and unaware. We did embarrassing things all the time and didn't even realize it .

As we grow up, we learned what it feels like to get embarrassed through society. Most people get flustered and it shows in their mannerisms, which physically feeds into their emotional embarrassments. Not only did something embarrassing happen to you, but now everyone is able to tell that you're embarrassed because of your face. Your actual face this time. To avoid this, you can wear blush every day so that you'll be prepared if anything embarrassing were to happen to you. No one would be able to tell since you already have blush on your face. Unless you are a boy, then you can't really take this route. Or, you can reach the point where embarrassing things happen to you so often that you've gained partial immunity to it like I have. When you've reached this point, it's easier if you could laugh it off and embrace it.

Stairs

Most people fall down the stairs, but like Jennifer Lawrence at the Oscars, I trip up the stairs....frequently. This is a weekly occurrence. Up the stairs to cardiac hill, up the stairs from crossroads to the cafeteria, up the stairs in my dorm, anytime there are stairs I am vulnerable to tripping up them. It's embarrassing, yes. But I've gotten to the point where it's just a natural instinct to say "oh" and laugh when it happens.

Josh Groban

From age 2 and a half until age 6, people would book me to sing at their weddings. I had a mini singing career and whenever I go places with Vietnamese people, someone would say "oh you're that girl who used to sing at weddings!" However, that was and will be the only singing career I will ever have. A lot of people used to not know this, but I also have another talent: the ability to sing like a man. Not only sing like a man, but to sing like a man well. One of my favorite songs is You Raise Me Up by Josh Groban, and one of my best friends caught me singing it in a man voice. At Senior Grad night on a yacht, all of my best friends made it a point to make me go up in front of a lot of my classmates who were in that room, to make me sing it out of nowhere. I was seriously pressured so hard to the point where I really didn't have a choice. Yeah, it was embarrassing but after that, I was forced to do an anchor by a majority of the people in the room. No, it does not make me proud to have this ability to sing like a man, but after this experience, I've grown to embrace it. I mean, I won't go start a singing career as a woman-man singer, but I'm no longer as embarrassed by it. I've almost gotten to the point to be able to embrace it. 

Spinning

My best friend and I decided that it would be fun to spin in a circle with our heads down for 30 seconds on opposite sides of the street with the goal of meeting running towards each other and high-fiving in the middle. Obviously, we were extremely dizzy and after I met her in the middle, my friend caught me but I bounced off of him and straight up ate it on the ground. Why we chose to do it on concrete. I don't know. This was pretty stupid and embarrassing since it left a huge hole on my chin. When people asked me what happened, I'd either say I got in a fight, that it was a birth scar, or a pimple. But now, it's gotten to the point where when me and my friends think about it, we just laugh about it. I've learned to embrace my spinning scar. Just thinking of having to explain how I got this scar to my future husband, my future husband's family, or my kids cracks me up. 

Social Contexts

If we take the time to think about all of the embarrassing situations that we've experienced, it usually involves other people--whether it was something we did to someone else, or in front of someone. Anything that's done in public and is observable by other people is what makes a person feel even more embarrassed. I believe that if these embarrassing acts were to happen in private, we wouldn't even have to worry or think about it. It's in knowing that people are able to witness and know these things about you is what makes something embarrassing. This is due to the fact that someone can't un- hear or un-see things, so once something embarrassing happens to you in public, people will remember it and a lot of the times, you won't be able to live it down.

Public Restrooms 

As a college student, one of the biggest adjustments that had to be made was sharing a bathroom with a bunch of other girls. I'm sure that I speak for most incoming college freshmen when I say that one of the biggest concerns and fears was having to do the deed in a public restroom for the whole school year. This can be uncomfortable or even inappropriate, but it's the truth, which makes it embarrassing for many people, myself included. It was such a big concern that on move-in day, some of the girls on my floor came together and talked about it. What if someone comes in while I'm trying to go? What if I fart? What if it smells? And the list of eminent fears goes on and on. At home, in your own comfort and in privacy, it wouldn't be a problem. But since it's in a public restroom, the potential for face to be threatened and as a result, getting embarrassed, becomes a greater possibility.

Creepin' 

This weekend, I let one of my friends use my phone to go through my Godsister's instagram because he thought she was hot. While I was talking to my other friend, I looked over and saw that he was laughing nervously and had that "I messed up" face. He told me that he accidentally liked a picture of her in a bathing suit from last summer. Great, now my Godsister thinks that I'm creepy. Creepin' is informally defined by trustworthy lingo site Urbandictionary as "The act of scrolling through pictures, wall-to-walls, videos, and general information on social media profiles of people whom one would not normally talk to in person. To essentially spy on everyone and everything. Rain or shine". Don't lie, we all do it. Most people prefer to creep alone in private, but some are able to creep with someone they're comfortable with. It's a practice that's done but not openly spoken of and that's totally fine....until you forget that you're creeping and accidentally "like" a really really old picture on instagram or facebook. In doing so, you've publicly made it known to the other person, that not only are you a creeper, but that you're creepin' on them. Unfortunately, many of you that are reading this right now have experienced an increase in heart rate, a flushed face, and that sinking feeling in your stomach thinking "crap, this is so embarrassingly awkward"

The Wink

My sophomore year of high school, my friend and I were doing our homework at a Starbucks. She left to go get her drink leaving me at the table by myself. I noticed that a guy across from me was winking at me, and he was pretty good looking. So after a little while, I winked back at him...which now that I think about it, was a little weird of me to do. After I winked at him, he gave me a surprised and weirded out face. My friend sat back down and that blocked my view of him. However, I noticed as I sparingly looked over at him, that he would wink every 5-10 seconds. The guy probably either had dry contacts on or just had a minor twitching problem. When I realized this, I felt so embarrassed. He was just a stranger, it shouldn't matter what he thinks. Yet, I haven't winked at anyone since then due to this fear. 

Smelly Cat 

My embarrassed reaction during the release of my "Smelly Cat" hit.

Something that happened to me Junior year is a perfect example of public embarrassment. One of my best friends was going through something pretty tough, so while we were video chatting, I sang my rendition of "Smelly Cat" by Phoebe from friends because that song is hilarious to me. I had no idea that while i was messing around singing this song, that she was recording my voice  on another app. The next day, I came into my chemistry class and everything was routine. Everyone was talking to each other and Ms. Couling, my teacher, was on her laptop. All of a sudden over the classroom loud speakers, I heard my voice. It was me singing smelly cat. My best friend gave
the file to my teacher, knowing that she loves cats. Ms. Couling is known for    
                                                                                                    being one of the cooler teachers so exposing me is no surprise. Not only did she play it for my chemistry class to hear, but for ALL of her chem classes. And she has multiple chemistry classes. For the rest of the day, a lot of people in my school knew me as "smelly cat girl" Someone even went as far as to add a beat in the background. There's even a version in a higher annoying pitch, basically it just went viral. People in my school who didn't know me even heard about it. Yes, I was publicly embarrassed and this was due to the fact that this was the image that a lot of people now would hold of me.

   

Defining Face

Embarrassing acts are part of human growth and every day life. Whether they occur in public or in private, to yourself, to your friends, or even to strangers, they are bound to happen. The main reason why some actions may be considered as embarrassing or get the feeling of embarrassment is due to an innate characteristic that not all of us even notice or realize we have: face. This is not literally referring to your physical superficial face--your nose, your eyes, or your mouth.
It is a symbolic face that we refer to when we commonly hear people saying that they are trying to "save face" or when someone has "lost face". To be clear, they are not talking about someone literally losing their face or trying to save it in a vault.

This face is an image or characteristics that we impose or present through our interactions with other people. Protecting this face is what helps us produce relationships and exist in society. This is something that we define and claim for ourselves, even if we don't consciously realize it. Face is an image that is social as well as public. It does not refer to how you value or think about yourself, but rather what is revealed to others through your action, it's what you want them to see and know. Technically, it's your ability to play a role in society, which can vary depending on who you're interacting with. Face is public and social because it's able to be observed by both people who are close to you, as well as complete strangers. It's public because face is seen in observable actions, and it's social in that it involves the actions of all the people involved, not just yourself. Because we're so emotionally invested in face, when an action threatens or distorts the face that we wanted to present, the result is the feeling of embarrassment